JENNY GABS ON: Starscream Armor Scare Glow (Masters of the Universe X Transformers, Mattel, 2026)

It's interesting how different companies approach these collaborative projects. Hasbro has designated Optimus Prime, Megatron, Bumblebee, and Starscream as the main characters of Transformers, and indeed, it's those four in the crossover. If Mattel had that same attitude this would probably be Starscream Armor Beast Man, which wouldn't be a *bad* fit, but instead they did something much cooler. For half of his existence Scare Glow was barely a character at all, coming as he did at the very end of the vintage line, but he quickly became a cult fave once adult He-Fans started revisiting the franchise in the early 2000s and finally made his animated debut in MOTU Revelation. Scare Glow is a ghost--Starscream is sometimes a ghost. Starscream's ghost can possess other bots (including Waspinator in that one episode of Beast Wars!), so is he possessing Scare Glow, or is Scare Glow possessing a still-living Starscream? 

I'm just kidding, this is Scare Glow wearing *Starscream Armor*, because that's the conceit we're going with. The heroes of Eternia met the Turtles and the Thundercats, but there are no actual Transformers in this story, they're just wearing armor inspired by them. You can decide if he sounds like the late great Tony Todd or the late great Chris Latta.

Like Skeletor, Scare Glow's torso is entirely new. The red part is molded separately, creating a great layering effect and giving it some depth.  Actually, other than his hands and thighs all of Scare Glow's parts are brand new. His face, upper arms, and lower torso are molded in glow in the dark plastic, as is tradition. It's not as bright as the standard Scare Glow but you gotta appreciate the effort. Also he glows blue instead of the more common green--perhaps to better evoke Starscream's ghost.

Furthering the connections to The Transformers: The Movie, in which Starscream takes the first step toward becoming a ghost, Scare Glow's armor has the crown, shoulder pads, and cape from Starscream's coronation as Decepticon leader, moments before being wasted by Galvatron. The purple cape evokes Scare Glow's typical garb, which is probably the reason for its inclusion. If you want a more basic look, all of these pieces are removable. The crown is made out of soft plastic For Safety Reasons, so the points will warp if you don't store it properly.

Most of his accessory budget goes to the coronation gear, but Scare Glow is still armed with two null rays, which are surprisingly versatile. They can be plugged into his shoulders to complete the Starscream look, or he can hold them as a pair of twin axes, or he can hold them as guns (there's even a hollow space for his thumbs to go for a better grip), or they can plug together end to end to make a staff evocative of Scare Glow's signature halberd. This last one isn't mentioned in any of the marketing material for some reason, maybe because of how rigid the null rays are being a breakage concern, maybe because it looks kind of daft. But hey, I'd rather have the option than not. They can also plug into his back using the same ports as the cape, another undocumented feature, possibly accidental.

I don't have any other "Ghost of Starscream" (or indeed, Coronation Starscream) figures in my collection, and I love both characters, so I'm tempted to say this is my favorite of the MOTU X Transformers crossovers. He just ticks so many boxes. It's real close between him and Optimus Prime Armor He-Man, but either way the second wave was much stronger than the first. Didn't stop it from going to clearance too! Crossovers are on pause for the rest of the year, but I'd love to maybe see one more wave with Beast Man/Soundwave (a stronger thematic pairing) and Teelita-1. We're also still supposed to get a Transformers X MOTU item from Hasbro, so my favorite special interests aren't done with the mashups yet.

 

JENNY GABS ON: Kane (Masters of the WWE Universe, Mattel, 2021)

Masters of the WWE Universe is back! Kind of. If your Walmarts are anything like mine, they're in a constant state of being picked clean of any and all wrestling figures that are interesting in the slightest. I can't imagine they would bring it back for just one series, though. Mark my words, there's definitely going to be a Danhausen dressed as Skeletor in the near future. In the meantime, the original run has a robust selection of sword and sorcery sports entertainers to build out your roster.

Kane debuted at Badd Blood: In Your House in the fall of 1997, interfering in the inaugural Hell in a Cell match between his estranged brother the Undertaker and Shawn Michaels. In the following years the Devil’s Favorite Demon had his story modified and retconned so many times WWE once published a fiction novel in an attempt to tie it all together. But initially the story was that Kane was badly burned in the funeral home fire that killed their parents and had been kept locked away by Paul Bearer as a secret weapon should he and Taker ever be at odds. Silent, sadistic, and with the ability to summon fire, Kane was a masked monster that instantly captured my young imagination.

…eventually he would roll a wheelchair-bound Zack Ryder off the Raw stage and electrocute Shane McMahon’s testicles with a car battery, but this was way before that.

MOTWWEU splits the difference between “wrestler in a MOTU setting” and “wrestler mashed up with a MOTU character,” and Kane is the latter, taking his cues from Roboto. Because Kane’s nickname was The Big Red Machine. This is also why he beat up Pete Rose at three consecutive Manias! His stark red and black color scheme looks great on a MOTU body. His limbs are robotic, and like Roboto, he has interchangeable weapons for his right hand. He doesn’t include Roboto’s axe hand, but he can accept any of the weapons from Roboto or Metal-Boto, but not Trap-Jaw, so no “See No Evil” hook. He additionally includes an effects piece that plugs onto the end of his blaster, turning it into a flamethrower! His hair fades into translucent fiery orange, another reminder of the fire that killed his parents and scarred him. Psychologically. 

Kane didn't often sport the two-sleeved look. Most memorably, it was when the Undertaker was posing as Kane, and thus needed both sleeves to cover up his tats. The modularity of MOTU Origins is a big help here, because you can just plug in any bare arm with a black wristband and have a more standard looking Kane. He's still got robot parts and orange eyes, though. Because of this figure, the Superstars release came in his reversed colors/primarily black suit. So I guess if you want a truly basic Kane in MOTU style, you're out of luck. You'll just have to settle for one of the hundred other Kane figures from the last thirty years.

Kane’s rookie figure was released toward the end of 1998, and it was the one wrestling figure above any other I really wanted for Christmas that year. I did, in fact, score him (and a bunch of others) courtesy of my awesome mom, and it was the best Christmas ever. So maybe that’s why I feel such a strong nostalgic pull to this guy, despite not fitting with the era I’m focused on for this line, and despite Glenn Jacobs becoming something of a villain IRL. Although his character has still done worse things, like sexually assaulting a dead cheerleader, or an alive Lita. Glenn would probably agree with forcing a rape victim to incubate a demon baby, though. What are the odds of getting a Gene Snitsky figure? About the same as Nailz?